Teaching a Difficult Child

All children learn differently. Some are visual learners, some can learn through oral presentation, and still others are self-staters. When I started homeschooling, I accepted that not all my children would learn the same. What I didn't know was, that I would have one child that would challenge me, my patience, and my time.

When you have the child that you just can't seem to motivate, that loses task, fiddles, plays around, procrastinates, works on one problem for what seems like an hour, what do you do? Many parents, lose patience.

They want to give up, throw their hands in the air and send them back to school. It is a tempting choice and one I would consider often on those days when my patience is thin and my will to endure is gone.

The one thing you do need to remember is that the journey isn't easy, and if you don't give up the tools that you give your child will last them a lifetime. I had to remember that when dealing with my child. She wasn't going to get the tools from public school. We had tried that and the only thing she had gotten was frustration, a sense of failure, and a lack of comprehension of what they were trying to teach her. She was just a number to them. Taking on the task of equipping her with the right tools was what I had decided to take on to prepare her for the world.

It wasn't easy, but we adapted to fit her needs. My ultimate goal was to teach her that she could adapt. We started out slow, and at a steady pace. We took the following steps:

Review this will enable you to assess where you need to set your goals.
Remembers that goals are fluid and can be modified.
Outline by starting with daily assignments that meet the child's learning style.
I started with our child, working on one subject a day because she had difficulty jumping from subject to subject. Each time she did her mind would take a long time to readjust and focus. In order to get her to the goal of moving from task to task I needed to get her mind used to the process of staying on task first.

Add In one subject to the day. After about three weeks of just doing one subject a day. I began to combining two subjects to complete per day. This was gradual and it began to shift her mind to handle more than one task a day. We eventually worked up to 7 subjects a day.

Keeping a Calendar is one of the greatest tools that anyone can use when multi-tasking. But this is an essential tool for the difficult learner. At the beginning of the day we would go over the day's lessons and activities that needed to get done. This gave her a visual point of reference and she could check off when she completed the task listed. You cannot overwhelm a child that has a difficult time learning.

Giving them a syllabus with all their assignments for the quarter, semester or year will only overwhelm them. They begin to look at all that they have to do and begin to panic. If you do then their brains shut down and cannot move forward. Integrate a little each day into the routine until you reach your goal.

A Real World Education

Are traditional schools preparing children for the real world? Most would not know how to anwer that question. Many would hope that was the case, but how can you be sure. Parents want to know that they are affording their children the best opportunity to have a great education. Some are not sure that the public school is providing it and have decided to home school their children themselves. Hoping to teach the children lessons the parents deem necessary for the real world. Others choose the homeschooling route so that their children are not exposed to ills of the world.

There is a point when children must enter their "real world" society and interact with their counterparts, and as Home Educators, we must prepare our children for that. Teaching children to face various situations is only accomplished through incorporating life skills into the studies. Educators must see the world with a different perspective. Parents must ask themselves, "will they prepared for college life?" not just the education, "will they be prepared for the work place"?

There is much to prepare for, but time is limited. First, parents must set attainable and definable goals for their children. Make a list and be willing to adapt and change it as the need arises. Next, integrate their teaching with real world situations. If students are assigned projects give them directions and parameters, but it is not necessary to hold their hand each step of the way. This will teach them skills for project and time management, accountability. Encourage them when they are working through problems, but don't be too ready to give them the answer so that their problem solving skills are exercised. Accomplishment on their own gives them a sense of pride and elevates their confidence.

One method you can incorporate into your children's studies is Syllabus Learning, as they do in colleges. Courses and expectations are outlined at the beginning of the semester. Assignments are established and target dates are set. This type of learning will prepare them for what is expected at the collegiate level and prepare them to be self-motivated.

There are a variety of avenues to educate, finding what works best is a matter of trying new things and being open to new ideas. If parents remember that all children, whether gifted, average or in need of assistance, all will rise to whatever level of expectation their teachers expect of them.